Ode to Ginger Nuts

If global warming makes you sweat
And your wheelchair is in a rut,
Just use a cat as a landing mat
For a packet of ginger nuts.

Let them complete your every meal,
Try them. No if’s or buts.
Flush out all worry with a spicy curry
Wedged down with ginger nuts.

Cast out all plain and chocolate chip,
They’ll wreck and rot your gut.
Neither big or small from a chocolate stall
Can wipe the arse of a ginger nut.

By Dermy McNally